You Can Find Better

If you’re wondering if you can find better, you can. You can find someone prettier than who you’re with. You can find someone younger. You can find someone thinner. You can find someone with deeper blue eyes, a higher sex drive, and a better personality. If that’s not your thing, you can find someone who likes comic books, who loves alcoholics, or who doesn’t mind paying the bills while you play video games. That person is out there. And someone better than her is out there. And someone better than her is out there. Keep looking. You’ll keep finding better and better during each search. But what is it that you are looking for? What do you want? What caused you to wonder in the first place?

You should want someone who makes you stop looking. You should want someone who listens to you describe how much you like each of those qualities and convinces you how much better you have it. Or, agrees with you and sets goals to achieve those things. I want someone who is content not looking for bigger and better. I want someone who enjoys the fact that I say yes to every last-minute air hockey game, Netflix binge watching day, or trip to her mom’s house to repair the leaky roof. I want someone who didn’t have a list of requirements that were a dime a dozen. I want someone who is deeper than that. And I want someone who gets more satisfaction from our accomplishments together than someone else’s accomplishments alone.

It’s not hard to continually trade up. It’s not hard to have conditional love and wavering commitment. It’s not hard to have sporadic desires and nonsensical expectations. It’s not hard to bail when things get tough. It’s not hard to protect yourself, protect your heart, and protect your pride from failure. It’s not hard to continually search for greener grass and judge everyone else’s situation based on its hue. If it was, fewer people would do all of those things. If it was, you’d have done those things less often in your past.

Find someone who knows when to turn certain songs up. Find someone who looks at you and smiles before laughing in uncomfortable situations. Find someone who falls asleep next to you without remembering doing so. Find someone whose wants are so entangled in their heart and brain that listing them requires a lot of pauses, a lot of hand gestures, and an uncertainty that anyone else even understands what they are trying to convey. Find someone who knows something about commitment. Find someone who loves talking to you so much that they come to you with all of their wonders. And be smart enough to answer each one. Or be grateful enough to grab her hand and find the answer together.

You can look long and hard, but you won’t find anything better than that!